New Year’s Resolutions: Meant to be Broken?

New Year's ResolutionsIt’s still a good 5 days away but let no one say we don’t think ahead! Because now we’re going to be talking about New Year’s Resolutions! Yes, those things that you tell yourself, you’re gonna do next year but don’t really get to doing somehow! Or maybe, if you’re different from most of the population, somehow you do manage to get them done! Maybe you get them done and you prove to one and all that Man is the best animal when it comes to adapting. After all, the only constant thing in life is change isn’t it?

New Year’s resolutions have been and are always part of every New Year celebration. People will always pedge for the change yet many of us have the tendency to fail them after a few days, few weeks or few months. So, without further ado, let us tackle that strange and ticklish subject of ever changing for the better that we call New Year’s Resolutions:

Funny New Year’s Resolutions

There is something intrinsically funny about people trying so hard to change yet still staying basically the same. Resolutions challenge us to go forward and be different. I just don’t know if we always rise up to that challenge however. Check out these funny New Year’s Resolutions



For the internet addicts: I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I’m not a clock watcher.

For those parents who value quality time with their kids: I’ve always wanted to do charity work so I resolve to work with neglected children — my own.

For the Health buffs out there: I resolve to cut down on exercising. Too much of anything is bad for you anyway.

For all those perennially late office workers: I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse of traffic for being late. I will think of some more excuses.

For those guys who always go on the red or always get short on cash: I will balance my checkbook. (on my nose)

For those guys who want to get rich quick: I resolve to start buying lottery tickets at a luckier store.

Here’s a personal favorite. For all those guys who made Grand Theft Auto 5 the bestselling video game of all time: Next year I resolve to play more computer games. Scientists all say they are good for you and improve your visual skills. But we always knew that, right?

For all the smokers out there: I resolve to start a new healthy habit. Like smoking. Hey, it keeps tobacco workers in their jobs.

Popular New Year Resolutions

On that very healthy note, let us switch gears to those resolutions that are popular year in, year out. The resolutions that would fill a category for Family Feud. The kinds of resolutions, people always want to do, but do they do them? Well.. what do you think? Survey says..


Quit smoking. Yes, that’s the way the resolution should really go. We all know the statistics. We all know smoking can shorten your life. We all know it’s really just plain not good for us. But we still do it anyway. If only this resolution stuck.

Lose weight. Same as smoking, we all know eating too much and obesity is just plain not good for us. So why is obesity now a worldwide problem? And McDonalds and all the other fast food chains are doing great business. Supersize that order please!

Diet. Same as losing weight and getting fit, diet is a part of our fitness, yet after a few days or weeks, we tend to forget our resolution right after we see those sweets and yummy desserts. Remind me to count the calories of this cake I am about to eat.

Save money. We all know someone who’s always short on cash. Someone who enters a room and empties it with his mere presence, simply because everyone knows he’s gonna ask for a loan to get by. It’s even worse if you’re the person yourself. There has to be a way to keep the money in your pocket somehow.

Get a better job. It’s so sad but a lot of people are just plain unhappy with their work. They slave in the office like mindless zombies and just get by, hoping for the break time bell to ring and for the end of the work day. Confucius said it best when he said: “Find what it is you love doing, and you will never need to work a day in your life.”

Sleep Early. When it comes to popular and always-included resolution in the list, this is probably comes first or second to mind. However, with the technology, social media, computer and other causes, some may just fail to adhere this for the whole year.

Drink Less. Well with the holiday that calls for the celebration, right after new year, drinking is a little bit inevitable. On the very first day, you tend to fail your resolution. How’s that?

Get Fit. Related to losing weight, and one not really being able to survive without the other, lots of people really want to start exercising. Studies have shown that just sitting down in a chair at the office everyday is shortening your life by as much as 4 years. Exercise also really releases healthy chemicals and hormones that actually make you happier ad think positive more. So what you are you waiting for? Get your butt out of that chair, stop staring at the monitor, and start moving and exercising! Or at least finish reading this article first before you start moving..


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